my brain is sober enough to have a conversation.. but my arms feel nice
Can I have the boy from 16 and pregnant's next baby???
you called to congratulate me on being the reason you lost never have i ever
you woke up and yelled "the tv is moving" and fell on the floor and passed back out
I have to have sex with him again. I feel like I need to train him so no other girl experiences that bad of sex.
It feels wrong to have dick mouth at a family dinner.
I have minimal recognition and a lot of burns on my tongue and my vagina hurts.
I'm so proud of us for fucking the same friend group before we met in a completely unrelated instance.
Threw up on the baby. National Tequila Day is the eve of National I'm A Horrible Nanny Day.
In your drunken glory you promised me, tongue, 12 naked pics, and 1,800 breakfasts.
He rubbed my back afterwards. I forgot how to talk and I legitimately thought I was a cat for a few minutes.
I want morning sex. We can incorporate maple syrup into it somehow, it'll be fun
It's just unfortunate that I still have the image of him having sex with me fresh in my mind
Uh oh we had sex and I don't think I like him anymore help
Swimming turned traumatic when grampas shorts slipped off..