Operation Purity has been aborted
Class is significantly more awkward when you know that your teacher knows what you look like with your legs behind your head... Just saying.
We both bought three foot bongs...going to race to see who can smoke a mile first.
Literally everyone in the bar was absolutely hammered out of their minds. I swear I even saw the bartender swigging jd when he thought no one was looking. And there was me thinking Britain was the booziest nation in the world.
Welcome to America. You're gonna love it.
I was trying to be quiet until started to feel like my cock was being dipped in a rainbow and then I stopped caring temporarily
My mom just covered me while I peed in the street. I love her. i also love parents weekend.
Seeing Grandma lick chocolate sauce off of the male stripper was definitely not the way I planned to enter the world of legal drinking.
The last thing I remember from that party was me shouting "hold my feet I'm going in strapped like Rambo"
there may have been a blood oath never to speak of it again...only reason i can think of as to why there was a 1 inch bloody cut on my right boob
I hope none of us try to run for public office one day
I cuddled with a man named Pickles
Plus you get to call him out on being a dick. It's more satisfying than ever sex I've ever had.
Last thing I remember I was riding on a picnic table being hauled around by a lawn mower with an empty case of bud light on my head...
I legitimately just had to leave work because I am too hungover. The front office ladies keep making fun of me.
you going clubbing tonight?
well its tuesday isnt it
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