I woke up with my face in a pile of pancakes and 3000 mistakes.
Who do you think planted the wheat? Who do you think cleared the land and killed off the native inhabitants? Women?
Theres this tee in the mall and it says all girls just wanna have safe sex. U make me think thats a lie
I actually kind of like the booze poos. It's like a colon cleanse. I feel skinnier.
21 MILFs That Made The Boys Crazy
we just bought Vicodin from the Chinese delivery guy, this day just keeps getting better.
You've never even broken a bone. You singlehandedly disprove natural selection
We won 11 games of beer pong, and then I spent a half hour trying to get into the top bunk. Then i realized it was a cabinet in the bathroom
well he got me up crazy early but i got pizza for breakfast and an electric blanket to sleep with sooo he passed the one night stand test.
My day in three words: secret purse cake
23 Ladies Who Have Mastered The Art Of Squirting
I don't know, I think it's at least a minor achievement when you can light up with the guy who took your virginity and act like you didn't have and incredibly awkward sexual experience together
So drunk I thought the door was feeling me up for a seconds
I'd just like to inform you. That when I was at bvj the first day I was blackout drunk by noon. Get on past Chelsea's level like now. Do it for present Chelsea
I almost forgot to feel shameful, if that answers your question.
Good friends chat about sex - great friends ask about safe words.
Bro, she said she wanteo to fuck me with my white Nike cap on so I resemble a douchebag. I think my choice of women might be coming into question