she burped and cried multiple times. it was like i was getting head from a baby.
if I hooked up with that creppy kkid in bio does that count as doing charity work during the holidays?
I'm not a pervert.. I just like to be naked...
he legitimately fell asleep standing up at the club. everyone was impressed
You kept tellin the cashier that this order was "To Go" over and over...even tho we were in the drive-thru
I think a kid would responsible me up
You're invited to our X-games themed party. We have an ice luge and every time someone eats shit we drink. It's gonna be great.
At least I got to make out with you a little before you proposed.
It was everywhere. My dick was a sprinkler of lost future children.
just for future reference, lake water is NOT mix for hard stuff. nor is it an adequate substitute.
I came to the party for him. I don't know where he went, but I mentioned being hungry and his housemate brought me a huge tupperware container of berry cobbler. I think I'll stay.
Well I either feel like the fat girl or very accomplished because his bed is now broken in three places
i guess "never drinking again" is not an option when you invent a whole new level of drunk...
How is it that I know 4 different bartenders who won't charge me for drinks, but I can't get laid?
Will exercising make me less horny?
Randomize
