Just got done shaving my balls. You were right.
dude i'm inner monologue high
i mean you're really good at taking the morning after pill...so you could put that on your resume..
yeah, i think fast in a bad sitatuion and am able to react with appropriate measures
I want a vodka facial right about now. I'm talking about straight vodka bukkake
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Valentines day isn't about being a couple in love..... It's about chocolate and faking orgasms.
he was once again the drunkest girl at the party
If i still have my costume on when i get home from the bar i am gonna be pissed
i miss freshman lecture halls much harder to take shots in a class of 20
Things you do not want to hear after sex: I almost lost my gum in your pussy. Really dude, don't share that with me!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Woke up naked on your sister's mattress lying next to a single slice of bread.
I just text my one night stand Happy Easter on her way home...now would be a good time for the lord to smite me.
so evidently blowing a guy does not mean he will say hi to you when he sees you in class.. in case you're ever wondering
I sit across from him at graduation so I get to stare at him and think about how I fucked his step brother and laugh to myself
It's a shame I've been hooking up with him for 6 months and he still doesn't know my real name.
I woke up under the kitchen table. Andy is cursing out Joe Exotic's name in between heaves in the bathroom. Jay is trying to sleep w/ a shirt tied over his eyes. Lena and Brad braved the sun to go get bloody mary supplies and food. I'd say the Tiger King drinking game was a success.
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