We're pretty sure the 'pocket' aspect of the hot pocket is unnecessary. Testing our theory now.
Guy at red light looking at porn. I'm waiting for him to look over at me so I can shake my head and he can feel bad
you announced to everyone at the bar "fuck girls. they're confusing. im gonna start having sex with boys now"
My dad assaulted a TSA agent this morning. Shut down airport security. Don't tell me that your family is embarrassing.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just an fyi, teatherball while wasted might be the hardest sport ever.
I know the scar will be in an obvious place, that's why I'm certain it'll score me cancer blowjobs
Man, the last time I saw you you were giving me a thumbs up while being pulled out the bar by your belt from some girl.
he just chased his shot of tequila with a chicken nugget.. either its a canadian thing or hes wasted
i just won "most creative" category in the condom contest in human sexuality by licking it onto a cucumber. my feedback forms included three phone numbers, one with a Magnum XL taped to it
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
And before you knew it they were calling me the pussy usher or something like that
I really should have gone with the man who kept offering me cocaine. Why did I chose the German!? STUPID!
I don't know which is worse, the fact that his name is Kevin or the fact that he has a pornstache.
I fucked a marine... I told him it was like personal revenge and he said he could live with that and that he didn't mind being used.
Dude, my back STILL hurts from carrying the team on BP last night.
Sorry I totally pulled a home invasion on you last night
That was super inconsiderate of me
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