Woke up this morning 8 levels higher in Call of Duty then when I started drinking... told you I was better when I was drunk.
just learned how to wash a penis. thank you nursing school for getting me the most action i've had in months.
Why are you covered in frosting?
Friend's birthday situation turned into enlightened cake orgy.
hooking up with my manager sounds like an even better idea while i'm sober.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I really hope you aren't where I think you are. Dude she has a MUSTACHE. You need Jesus..
she uses eco-friendly sex toys. she is the literal definition of a hippie.
I HAVE A PRESENT FOR YOU AND ITS NOT MY VAGINA
I don't know if I want to cry scream puke or go somewhere and drink more. This is such a weird emotion.
Apparently, my drunken 3AM idea of safety is to send a GPS map of my location to someone 700 miles away. Seriously considering death as a viable alternative to this hangover. Death or Yuengling.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
he gave me a thermos so I could take my coffee with my on drive of shame. I was unexpectedly grateful...
I walked around with red solo cups on my feet, weeds tied around my neck and a tree in my hand
We're about to play the try not to vom at the president's house game...
Something about the fact that I could do coke off her ass cheeks just speaks to me
we f'd six times
f'd?
its sunday, i cant say fucked
Sexual Dilemma - Covid Edition: Flirting with a cute frat boy. The Cougar in me wants to go back to his frat house and fuck his cocky brains out. The adult in me doesn’t want to get Covid and have to quarantine in a frat house for 2 weeks\n
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