Shaq going to Cleveland; Vince Carter to the Magic; Michael Jackson, Farrah Fawcett, and Ed McMahon die.... ARMAGEDDON IS UPON US!!!!!
i wouldn't be half as slutty if there were better things to do.
That shit is worth it...they got medicine for that now a days
bubblegum was invented today. we're getting drunk. end of story.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It smelled like mall pretzels. Of course I investigated.
He compliments me like a gay guy and fucks me like a starved nympho. I'm in love.
This from the guy I found eating salad out of a pot lid in his boxers on his porch last night.
It was less of a bar, and more of an abandoned basement that some people sell booze in.
My Internet history has 23 searches for 24 hour cake. Self respect plummeting.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dude, did you know, your blood is contaminated with over 17 non-beer fluids?
I just hooked up with the same bartender my dad cheated on my mom with in the 90s. Not sure how this makes me feel.
family traditions my good sir
Do you think I'm short enough to dress up in a ghost costume and go trick or treating and have people believe that I'm actually a child?
She got up, grabbed me a box of gushers told me to start eating, and immediately gave me the best head I've ever gotten.
So I come home this morning to get ready for a job interview and there is garlic seasoning all over the hardwood and a knife in the wall. What. the. fuck.
just used my $120 dollar stats book for the first time to kill an ant... good thing i stole it
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