bang him and never speak to him again. also, queef in his face.
i dont this its possible to queef on command.
im doing shots everytime lil jon says it in the song shots....blackout town here i come
I don't think you'd be able to understand Inception if you weren't high...
you know you made out with my sister while holding Ur girlfriends hand while she was puking in the toilet right
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Meet me at the corner of "what the fuck" and"how'd you get in my bed" in 10 minutes.
Hey I'm not sure why your jacket's covered in maple syrup but I just realized you didn't leave the house earlier wearing a jacket...
You were captain morganning on the laundry hamper and when I walked in you slingshotted a thong at me and started peeing. This all came back to me when I picked up some jeans to wear and they smelled like piss.
We were licking ciroc off the poker table
I was too drunk to remember throwing up so i probably didn't learn my lesson
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I have alcoholic tendencies but you know what? College
It was all fun and games until he noticed the hickey that he hadn't given me...
I just told the joker that my vagina is the bat cave and he needs to infiltrate it.
I did my patriotic duty. I woke up next to a veteran this morning.
He left cushions on my floor, chocolate on my bra and unexplained scratches on my thighs. I think this one might get a second date.
I have two bottles of emergency tequila stashed under my desk at work.
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