Cool, see you soon... she just admitted to her friends that it was a queef.
dude, that girl smelled worse than the great depression.
i had a dream last night that you and i organized a foursome. swear to god
ps i'll be in miami in early july. this text has no relation to the last one
Im so sleepy and hes snoring super loud! i just wanna suffocate him, sleep, and deal with the body when I wake up
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I learned to sign I want to be on you today
Score
Deaf chicks here I come
There is tupperware vodka. thats right tupperwares full of vodka. best leftovers ever
Apparently there was a point in the night that they literally thought he was dead, ass naked on the floor. That bad.
She just came to my house, with puke in her hair, to wake up my dad and scream "happy fathers day you DILF!" at the top of her lungs
With any luck I will spend the duration of this flight with my tray table up my seatbelt securely fastened and my face in his lap
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
What sexual position says im sorry for your loss?
It's like a challenge who can be the biggest embarrassment to the family. I win 80% of the time.
Like for real, is your junk ok? I have to look after my investments.
I can't go to the bars anymore. She wanted to see me again and I drunkenly told her I was moving today. If she spots me I'm fucked.
I swear to fucking god if he takes away netflix I will have no problem sending his gf our sex videos
There is a man in my bed with "new zealand" tattooed on his back. Wtf happened last night?
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