ha so i just found a picture of you eating paper towels and many of Laura freaking out from it.
i saw her thong sticking out from across the bar...that was my cue
they just tried to tell me they weren't big into drugs. A) it was the 70's. B) I've seen the pictures.
If it makes you feel better, I doubt anything could survive in your uterus.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he tried to convince me he was a seal.. sound effects included. and then asked me to 'be his lady seal'.
I left two shots of jager for you guys when you wake up from your death. Do with it as you wish
I should have to wear a sign around the rest of the day so everyone knows the shame I feel.
She gave me head while using a laptop on my stomach to go online. I've never seen a better feat of multitasking.
New low: just got woken up by my 9 year old cousin throwing an empty at me and telling me to get my life together.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If by some world ending natural disaster I get into an actual relationship with this kid, should I tell him the truth about the web of lies I've based our current relationship on?
Well I've consulted some psychics but they keep saying all they hear in my head is screaming and all they see in my future is pool noodles and cheese dip?
Observations from Vegas: #1. Strippers pasties pose a choking hazard. #2. Best. Heimlich. Ever.
The language barrier was annoying .... So we just had sex. That is how you deal with not being able to chat isn't it???
i asked your drunk ass where the fuck you were going and you screamed “WENDY’S BITCH”.
Are you coming over for scrambled eggs and hand jobs?
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