I did the walk of shame to another booty call
I don't think that should turn me on, but it does
She was so drunk yelling at me in my driveway to fuck her. It was the ghetto version of Romeo and Juliet.
Just found my mom passed out in my bed holding a bag of wine. Not sure if I'm ashamed or proud.
Next time, showing us his dick should be his entry fee into your house.
we can be functional adults and still think pizza lunchables are the shit
Is it frowned upon to bring a flask to the er?
my dad has now seen 6 different dudes grab my ass. i guess i should start a list.
No, supporting your unemployed boyfriend IS NOT what credit cards are for.
Locals got pissed I was talking to the barmaid. Tried to tell me that they keep all the good beer at "a Soho walkup" Google saved me
Just heard him in the middle stall. Sounded like someone emptied a toolbox into the toilet.
Oh I fucked him, definitely. We played Strip Halo.
If you could come do me into like a 12 hour coma that'd be great
I know. I'm a saint. Saint of sitting on faces.
Tbh I would eat a grilled cheese off your dick.
You ate ashes out of my bong
Randomize
