How was Slumdog? Did it pull your heartstrings?
It was entertaining. Better than most other Mexican films.
if im not pregnant im gonna be so pissed for spending the money from my weed fund on the test
wow, a mother in the making
All the alcohol I spilled on myself must have acted as a disinfectant or something. I haven't showered in three days and I still don't have a staph infection from sleeping on the lawn with you.
If it snows I'm just gonna sit at my house in my costume and drink beer by myself all night.
He came over hammered at four in the morning with roses trying to get me back when my new fling opened the door he just stood there crying for 40mins even after we closed the door
He is full of southern hospitality and I want to be full of him.
Any sexual interaction is meaningless without pizza during half time.
That seems dangerous to buy acid from a stranger on craigslist
Is it possible for mice to climb? If so I think mice are climbing into my bed in the night and playing with my hair..
I can get something to clone your cock for $40. It's worth it. It's my birthday present to myself.
OMG I CAN GET A GLOW-IN-THE-DARK ONE
dude, you ran into a window then asked ME what the fuck I was doing.
When he said he lived in a closet I thought he meant his room was really small or something... But he actually has a queen size mattress on the floor of his roomates walk-in closet.
I sprayed his whole room with my perfume and left lots of my hair on the bed. So now if he does bring her home, the bitch will know this territory is marked.
He stopped me mid-blow job to say that his new year's resolution was to stop hooking up. MID FUCKING BLOW JOB.
She's gonna be mad if she finds out you put weed in her house warming cookies
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