How many times do you have to sleep with a guy before you get him to kiss you???
WIFE SWAP. FAMILY OF MIDGETS. LIFETIME. NOW.
he couldn't find his key, so we just had sex on his parent's porch while we waited for his mom to get home.
I just found puke in my bra..
because you can't take the autistic girl you're babysitting on a blunt ride.
I had fun. Till he melissa etheridged my ass and came to my window.
Just a heads up, i'm sleeping in te back seat of your car so don't be freaked out when you see me in the A.M.
Want to get naked in Baltimore this weekend?
But don't worry I didn't actually get stitches, although according to the health center I probably should have
Just come here and visit. Enjoy the deliciousness of me being legal. Just don't think, and come here right meow. meow meow meow.
Vodka drinking games. Where you wake up next to a douche lord and see your thong in the blinds.
I've officially slept with/dated two guys that have gotten tased. What the fuck is wrong with me
Peeing in taco bell cups is part of the fun of going to taco bell
At the light, his mom pulled up next to us while I was giving him road head. He forgot to tell me she was meeting us at the movie. So long story short, I convinced her I drove myself, pick me up in 20.
THERE IS WATER LITERALLY DRIPPING OFF OF THE CHANDELIER. I OFFICIALLY HAVE THE WORLD'S WORST RAINFALL SHOWER HEAD.
Randomize
