new low, shannon just screamed FUCK THE IRISH to a 10 year old's face then proceeded to throw a hotdog at his parents. I think its time i take her home.
So I'm pretty sure when I was giving a Birthday Blow J, he went to grab my boob, but grabbed a fat roll and asked "You're not wearing a bra?"
Let's just say for some reason we thought it was okay to make a burrito smoothie.
he peed everywhere. it's like having a puppy.
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She said I looked exactly like my dad. Then she made out with me. Should I be questionable?
I guess I was trying to make a cheese sandwich, I had to change my sheets cuz I slept on it and the cheese melted all over me, Dave, and my bed
Let me be the 15% helpful, 85% useless as shit angel on your shoulder.
Steve watched craig and I have sex from the top level of his cat tower this morning.
My brother walked up to us as we were making out and was like "hey man, go to town!" and winked
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Well I smoked some weird shit and I think I peed on my phone.
I don't think I've ever been sadder than the way I feel when I finish my meal while I'm high
Pretty sure I just got the ok to have a one night stand in Maui...from mom. I'd say that's a win in my book.
I was so drunk, he put me to bed and went down stairs to hang out with his friends. Apparently, I was curled up in the closet, spooning the dresser when he came back up.
I woke up with what has to be a whole pack of smarties loose in my bra. Was that your fault?
There were a lot of gay moments in between the Strippers and coke
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