She said so on her MySpace, so it's gotta be true.
Well you know what I always say about freshmen.... If you want it, and they've got it... get it.
My insides feel lik shag carpet. It is awesome
im so bored in class... i just made a pie graph of my favorite bars and a bar graph of my favorite pies
i may or may not be dressed up as my farmville farmer. gonna harvest some ladiesss tonight!!!
I didn't think her British accent was real until I saw how fucked up her teeth were.
She was the most uninteresting drunk I've met
Just stuffed an entire cupcake in my mouth after finishing third glass of wine. Valentines day is pretty much going how i expected it.
Attn every girl I've slept with in the past 26 years of my life. One of you cunts gave me herpes. This is the 4th of 5 group MMS. That's right. It's in the 50s. There are two girls I don't have #s for. One was on a cruise and the other was a prostitute in Amsterdam. So which of you has herpes?
the cab driver asked if you were our mom. you definitely shouldn't have tipped him so much.
I swear to god little potato creatures live inside Belvedere bottles and claw at your throat as you swallow shots.
Getting haircut. The stylist asked about the body paint dried in my hair. I told her there was prob glitter, too. It was a fun night!
A gay dude just spanked me with a nicholas sparks novel and called me foxy. I'm putting this on my resume.
I didn't think it was possible but he dislocated his thumb during intercourse last night then cried
well, you know. whores of a feather.
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