maybe next time you shouldn't be drinking alone watching intervention at 3 am and no one would think you needed an intervention.
Ohhh, TODAY your worried. Becasue last weekend when we warned you about her you said "shes too hot to have herpes."
i caught him jerking off, doing his SAT Prep. forever alone.
she keeps giving me cups of everbeer.. its everclear and beer mixed. i guess its blackout or backout time
He grabbed onto my boobs while slipping on ice then proceeded to drag me down with him I'm not predicting head in his future
We need to get sombreros so I can give them to strippers.
He couldn't stand on his own, but he managed to somehow to get to the beer garden and get served 3 more. I'm proud to call him my cousin.
On a scale of one to america, how free are you this weekend?
We didn't have a blender so we made the margaritas by running over a garbagebag full of ice with the car and then stirring it with a knife in a French-press coffee pot. CAN YOU SAY RESOURCEFUL?
Sunday is a myth, I refuse to believe that I waste an entire day unable to function after a night of drinking.
That's not a good night. A good night is waking up with no skirt, no money, and the imprint of the edge of the bar on your forehead.
are you just inviting me because you can't afford an actual stripper?
I am laying in your bed and just found a bottle of wine under your pillow ...should have married you...
IDK MAYBE BC I WOKE UP IN AN AIRPORT WITH A ONE WAY TICKET TO LONDON
That man fucks like a champ. The sex was so good I did him again in the morning just to be sure
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