My first STD was from a foam party
That was definitely a porn plot just waiting to develop...
yea and when she crawled to her room she yelled at a bookbag to "get the fuck out my way"
im getting my college education on yahoo answers.
I figured he was gay when I walked in on him working out to Flirty Girl Fitness.
You told him how lucky he was to be an elephant and kept trying to grab his "trunk"
So what do you think the policy is on vomit in rental cars? do I have to clean that up or is that part of the service I'm paying for?
We are going all out this weekend. My liver is already smiling.
A guy just walked down the street dressed as Mickey Mouse holding a 40oz. Where the hell did you leave me?
He made me hold his dick and say "I solemnly swear that I'm up to no good"
to improve your porn experience, just imagine a slow speaking older English man narrating it all like a Nature documentary
My concierge just asked me to his place for dinner while I was signing for a delivery. The delivery was a box of vibrators. Let's discuss.
Back. Waiting on Thong the shuttle bus driver. THONG
I need to stop acting like a drunk bitch. People are going to get the right idea about me...
You're at a grade school volley ball game with a yeti of tequila. You've passed extra
Randomize
