I think about you every night.
I'm sorry.
I met the nicest Tranny last night. He/She loves Cheetos.
is it really this hard to find a guy i can fuck and have a good time with who doesn't ask where things are going btwn us?
you sound like my dream girl
If I don't wake up snuggled up to 14 ice cream sandwiches, my life is incomplete.
I told him he was my first gentile. He was so flattered.
She says she'll teach me how to make her squirt tonight so yea, I'm bailing again. I'm not sayin sorry since you don't have a better offer.
The bad decision stars are too close to aligning to risk this tonight.
I miss you too. And it was nice meeting your brother while I was mounting you
I felt like in order for him to make it to mordor and destroy the ring, he'd have to make sweet sweet love to me in some form of hut or cave.
How was the picnic?
We played softball, except our team sucked. In one hand was a mitt, the other a beer.
Why didn't you put them down?
No beer left behind.
I wore pigtails while I was having sex with that 22 year old just to make him feel like a pedophile.
I think we need to dedicate ourselves to building your stamina back to uterus breaking level
And for today's main disappontment. I thought I saw a midget with fireworks get on the buss, alas it's a child with cleaning supplies
I'm pretty sure I have PMS because I almost just cried about not being able to find a place that gives acrobat classes here.
I told him I might be pregnant and he said he'd buy me a test and a twix bar. I'm marrying him. Tomorrow.
Randomize
