I don't think cute and don't forget to get tested belong in the same text
today he pulled me aside to show me a lawn mower that he drew above his pubes. I saw his pubes in all their glory. Right there. In spanish class. Hola.
I'm bringing a flask to the test on friday. If I'm gonna fail at least I can enjoy the experience
you goin out tonight?
who is this.
your orgasm for tonight
sometimes after I smoke and the high has gone away...the high will come back like three hours later for a brief yet gripping ride.
that's usually when I end up in someone's house, having sex with someone else, while that someone's roommate makes us mozzarella sticks.
In the wise words of Scar: "be prepared."
Do you think Scar was a Boy Scout?
IF WE WERE REALLY BEST FRIENDS FOREVER YOU GUYS WOULD AGREE TO A WATCHING A PORNO PARTY
I try new drugs instead of new boys. That way you can't scold me about the importance of condoms
Every time you visit for the weekend I end up having to bleach my entire house after.
It's pizza for people who hate themselves. I rang the place up once i'd finished and told them if i was on death row it would be my last meal because by the time i'd got half way through it I would be begging to die.
But then I ordered two more because it was 2-4-1 and my life is a mess
I like her because we want the same things out of life AND she actually wants to have sex with me.
Too stoned. Randomly can't get the image of Emilio estevez's smiling face out of my head. What is life.
I feel like the first time i have to use my accident insurance its going to be in some sex mishap with you.
Me and my liver are not on speaking terms.
I may or may not have just had sex in the bed of a pick-up at a drive-in movie theater.
Randomize
