Dude they have ski ball. Anywhere that has skiball is bound to be bangin.
I returned the dress. When they asked for the reason for return I said, 'I don't deserve to wear white'.
Stealing vibrators from Walmart together was when I realized you'd be my Maid of Honor.
when he was about to finish he told me to avert my eyes and keep my lady parts away. chivalry isnt dead.
The only funny part about this situation was this morning when they rounded up all the drunks in the ER, piled us into a minivan, then dropped us all off at our houses.
I'll have my TA grade the tests, she needs something to do anyway. Wanna race to the bar on segways?
Mike is worried about me going on a cruise in June without him....how cute he thinks we are going to last till June
We legit stopped the the game so that Jamie and I could throw up in the bushes, and then continue to play intramurals... this is what my life is coming to1
This would be a good time to bring up the fact that my spider-man fork is MIA
CAN I EVER JUST MAKE OUT EITH SOMEONE AND NOT GET FRIEND REQUESTED BY THEM THE NEXT DAY.
I swear, the cow we tried to tip tried to eat me. and all I could think was, oh how the tables have turned. worst trip ever
Just bought a gingerbread house kit and pregnancy tests. Happy holidays.
She gave me a roadie as we drove home from fireworks. People were still lighting off their displays as we drove by. I love America.
I'm sure as hell not getting hoodwinked into going back to rehab again
You fell out of his top bunk onto his set of golf clubs. After seeing blood on your leg, you proceeded to sing "the first cut is the deepest" while sprawled on the golf clubs
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