halloween costumes for girls are easy, slutty teacher, slutty cop, slutty nurse, etc...
exactly, that's why i want something interesting
slutty neuroscientist?
all i remember thinking as i was puking my intestines out is : wow.. this toilet does look like it's from the future.
No, don't worry. We're not going to get THAT arrested.
I think I'm going to postpone my photo shoot until my Gpa dies. I don't want to be in lingerie and stripper heels when I finally get the call
I get hit on by the prison guards every time i go to see him. Seriously.
She showed me her tits and my first thought was "I want these to feed my future children." I'm scared.
think before you get married my friend it's my birthday and just got done jacking off
EXCEPT MY COUSIN SAW MY SEX TAPE!
TYLER OWES ME SO MUCH
I LET A CREEPY MAN I DONT KNOW SUCK ON MY NIPPLES
The language barrier was annoying .... So we just had sex. That is how you deal with not being able to chat isn't it???
Just reached for my phone in my non existant pocket while it was in my hand.
I frew up on some kids lovely sidealk chald drawings..
You need to get out of there before he falls in love with you.
I just ordered a five person drink for myself.... Right about now you should start saving me from myself....
I need to leave my mind and my stupid vagina are having fight over who's right
Randomize
