You were so drunk last night you typed www.face.come/cheese.com as if you were logging into facebook.
you missed kickoff and the first round of bodyshots. I suggest you get here now.
nothing worse than walking out of class after 3 hours and having covered exactly zero information
walking out with herpes. that would be worse
So me and him are making out, and the other two are on the couch behind us. he randomly stops kissing me and goes "oh god I think she just took off her shirt" I look behind me and I see her tits flapping up and down. This man has amazing senses..
Why are there so many fucking Lambchop puppets hidden around my house?!
You think he will forgive me for the paper being a week late if I bring him a beer?
...it's a 9am class...
Although now I have "number of cheese slices" as a unit of boob measurement in my head.
Let he who has not made drunken spaghetti at 3 a.m. cast the first stone.
I'm 4,715,723% sure I don't give a fuck.
I might go bald with this hair pulling thing every night.
Facebook is for cat videos and having better lives than people from high school, period.
learning about efficiency and effectiveness in an administration seminar. real world application: walking across the street to the pub on break to shotgun a beer.
How’s the date going?? Do you think he’s gonna cut your face off and wear it to his birthday party?
Lighting a fucking bong with a candle. Straight up dedication.
The ass gains better be worth it
Randomize
