I totally understand Scottish logic. No underwear+skirt=great
how do you have sooo much energy?
billy mays threw in a lil somethin extra when i ordered some oxiclean last week
dude we were making out and she kept singing the americas next top model song. you wanna be on top?
still haven't packed clothes. only wine. gotta love spring break
Eventually the creepy theater major quirks will come out. Probably in bed. Like role playing as the Phantom of the Opera
There's nothing I can say to make me pepper spraying you any better
My little brother just suggested we drink the rest of the vodka because it's raining. My job is complete.
You know Im horny if Im walking around in my lingerie and sex robe. It's my field of dreams mentality. If I wear it, he will come.
So update from last night: I made friends with a coke dealer, I tore the card scanner off the wall of my dorm, and I passed out on our bathroom counter with my head in the sink.
DAMMIT Im supposed to be running a company not discussing dick piercings!
I'll pretend I don't know she's blind, my morals claimed the back seat in this adventure.
I woke up knowing I have nowhere to be today except parties and it was glorious and I am so happy
All I want to do is lay in my bed and eat hotdogs
Chasing shots with airborne.. Gonna get rid of my sickness and my soberness.
i just realized i have only had sex on couches so far this year. i can't decide if that's impressive or trashy
Randomize
