Denial is the first step to alcoholism…and I don't hate it
i woke up this morning to a slap on the ass and jake saying "you should let me put it in your ass now" i need out of this relationship.
for sure. did you let him do it?
thats not the point.
Facebook really needs to add a bikini picture profile tab for girls, it would really save me countless amounts of time!
So me and friend just finished Eiffel towering this girl and sounds great in theory but after the high five has commenced its just a weird threesome especially when you make eye contact with your buddy during the session
I'm drinking whiskey outta the bottle trying to earn the trust of some ducks in the yard
Howd you meet this guy?
I found him next to my pants on sunday morn.
You're going to the beach with me so we can have beach sex whether you like it or not. Get over it. Kthx.
Haha I will however wear glass and and draw a lightning bolt scar if you want to have sex that way, and that can be the only time you can call me Harry.
I will be your sherpa up the mountain of gayness
it's not that I hate people, I just want to rip most of their faces off.
to answer your questions bluetooth, 30ft, like a tampon, ask her, her idea, got tired of trying to find her in crowed clubs
Serious question: does drunken cyber sex with a stranger on omegle count as cheating???
Well, I crapped my pants in front of her entire family, was laughed out of their house, and I had to walk home with shit stained pants. So, yeah, it went really well.
Well drunk me was looking out for sober me again, hid the beer and bought another case for me
In my defense, the second lapdance I gave was because of a dare.
Randomize
