It's sad that I have started checking out the ring finger before the rack...I'm getting old
I just met his other fuck buddy...I am thinking of befriending her just to fuck with him...manuplating my roommates into hating each other is boring me i need something else to do
It was all cool until he grabbed my vag and started screaming: THIS IS MINE.
I think 2012 will be the year I purposely put myself in awkward situations. Much like 2011 but really trying this time. Like fucking the little sister of a girl I already fucked and dating a chick that lives with her ex. It could be awesome or horrible.
Before you even think your day was worse than mine, I had to disinfect and and stitch another dude's penis after his prince Albert got ripped out by an angry chick.
In other more interesting news I'm going to arrange a surprise orgy. You in?
I cNt phones. tingles in my fingles. jingles
I just did a line of coke with an Olympic bronze medallist. I guess we know why he only got bronze.
In the last 3 months, I've slept with an ex,someone single, someone in a relationship, someone married, and someone divorced. I should get some type of grown up girl scouts badge.
My night can be summed up in 3 words: Vodka. Threesomes. Hospital.
I am going to be so excited tomorrow when I find this box of crayons in my purse
I was Jaeger weird. I was rolling on the floor pretending to be an Olympic gymnast and my name was Gina
How early is too early to start drinking when studying for the bar?
Facebook: “Hey you fucked on a diving board, you should probably should wish him a happy birthday”
Just stalked the girl I hooked up with last night's boyfriend. He seems nice, I approve.
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