I have a story that starts with Nutella and ends with sex in the laundry building at RIT.
he told us the story of how he fought ketchup, mustard, and thomas the train engine all in one night. if that doesn't sound like an acid trip i dont know what does.
Girls only wine night turned into a sloppy drunk lesbian orgy again
I hit her tiny dog with a horseshoe an hour ago. Her and her mom cried as it laid on the ground shaking. Im drunk.
Is it sad that I just used my electrical knowledge to not only fix but improve my vibrator?
He told me he was in a Proactive commercial. It didn't seem to work for him but he was buying me shots so I slept with him anyways.
Shes definitely an expert at this. Her happy hour goes from 4 to 11, then she starts drinking heavy. She also allots 15 minutes each hour for a pee/bj break
She's planning a December wedding, I'm planning on a June breakup.
She's not a foreskin expert like you
I never imagine I'd say this, but can I ask Jeff for the butt plugs back even though it was a gift and we broke up?
he's been 21 for 38 minutes and he's already trying to fist fight this dude over his girl
awwwww babys first drunken mistake
As he put it in he shouted "geronimo!"
Wow... So was the sex good?
Yeah but it doesn't matter. My vagina is not a pool.
Real life skills section of my resume: blow jobs, food knowledge trivia, sarcasm, mascaera application, sexting, tolerance of rail liquors
Apparently during my blackout I walked over to Troy, grabbed my crotch, and said “Eat Fresh” while his GF was with him. FML
My boyfriend's mom is the manager of Wendy's. The same one I took a pregnancy test in.
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