she was hot for a redneck and i dont look at teeth
We almost didn't get a second pitcher, but now we're getting a sixth.
I'm pretty sure the only race ive ever won was to my mothers egg
i was sitting in the back seat of her car with her boyfriend while she was driving. it was pretty awkward, but i dont think "so my dick's been in your girl's mouth too" was a good ice breaker
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It was literally the size of a half eaten tic tac.
Why is your signature on my underwear?
There was a community pot of Ramen, and if you were in the pool you were either fully clothes or ass naked.
Look at you go. You're like the Slutty Librarian that Could. They should write children's books about you. Children's books for adults.
I think if wine wasn't a thing I'd give up on life.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Plus he stuck it in when you were sleeping which would have been the tipping point for me but you art school kids are all liberal and shit
I would steal a car if I knew it had wheat thins in it
is it necessary to steal the whole car?
I think my favorite day of the week is the day we get to fuck
You may have gone on a date, but I ate chicken nuggets shaped like dinosaurs for dinner tonight. I think we both know who the real winner is here.
That's a beautiful sentiment.
Last night I crashed my housemates tinderdate, smoked his weed and then left. He felt too awkward to say no.#Empowerment
not being a booty call is very strange. Who knew there was so much time for activities at night!
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