I did the walk of shame to another booty call
I don't think that should turn me on, but it does
my room smells like sperm. sweet.
Instead of having sex, we spent the entire night making pillow forts and have sword fights. I think I'm in love
Ever since they found the bud they've been sending me visa gift cards instead of cash. Bastards.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You dont understand. she was my french AND spanish teacher. that's 2 kinds of freaky. i have to find her on facebook.
Yo dude either Brian has herpes or he was jerking off to Web MD 'cause I just walked in on him
So, after having sex with my 4th overweight girl in 2 weeks, I've decided Charlie Sheen syndrome is ruining my life.
She's never going to forget it... Christmas Anal.
hey. so did i get tied up by a jumprope last night?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You told them that the brownies were safe, and then pointed to a passed out Ryan and said "see?"
Woke up naked on your sister's mattress lying next to a single slice of bread.
The owner was showing me around and pointed at one of the bars and said "this is the one you're allowed to dance on. I could tell you wanted to ask." DREAM JOB.
I have never paid for drugs and I'm sure not going to start today especially on a holiday
I woke up in my neighbors backyard with glitter on my teeth and sparklers super glued on my bra. which part was your fault?
Whats a little breast milk between friends?
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