So many tools at one table, you'd enjoy my italian family
Because if the best sex I've ever had was with a gay guy, then God help me.
We fucked in my basement while hiding from the cops.. And now his Facebook picture is him and others holding up there MIP's in front of my house.. I feel obligated to add him as a friend.
He's short and fat and honestly I think he's what my self esteem was made for
Sorry, I was watching the Olympic story about the Canadian guy and drinking out of the prescription bottle and crying because it was so beautiful.
He texted me at 3am that you cut your hand at the bar and were bleeding all over.
I woke up to a text thinking you bled out at a bar, turns out you got your butthole licked.
Feels like I ran a marathon last night. A tequila marathon.
I'm honestly just now recovering from saint Patrick's day.
Well yeah. But im not sure i trust the black out drunk high girl giving life advice
Well I just had a flashback of something I did in the 4th grade. Now I can't go back to sleep.
The adults are the big ones right?
So...a chick sucked my crank...now her dog is licking my feet. I feel like a pharoh on vacation.
Well when we Get drunk it gets rowdy. We could always attempt self-control. But historically and statistically speaking, we fail at that.
Thanks for not letting me get involved with a serial killer. That's true friendship
BUT YOU GOTTA TASTE THE RAINBOW!!
That's what Skittles are for!
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