question - sack: should she or should she not play with it during foreplay?
Nick had a break down & said to me "Everybody's mad at me, I'm the douchebag, Im the fucking douchebag that everyone hates, Do you wanna come home with this douchebag?!"
You're going home with him aren't you?
I'll see ya in the morning when I leave his house
I'm pretty sure the new "vibrating mascara" is just a disguised dildo for those of us who are too ashamed to purchase a real one.
Well, at least their eye lashes will look good while they masturbate shamefully.
I think I just made patron unclassy I bought limes at a gas station and for salt we are using gas station packets of salt
Got high and weighed everything in the house. My head is 16.2 pounds. Is that ok?
hey, this is the ginger girl from the party...i've thought about it and I wanna join the american girl drinking team
obviously my window is still shattered. they're pressure washing my condo today. i think i need a bloody mary.
The last party at your house was a sex toy party...it's an obvious transition to baby shower
Totally passed out on the dealers bed after paying him all in ones so no, i dont think i'll be getting a discount soon.
On a totally unrelated note, captain four hour sexcapades lost it in his boxers this morning and tried to pretend it didnt happen. Lmao
Pretty sure I scared him off for good. The lesbian in me is ecstatic.
I also slapped not one but two bananas on the ass, twerked in public, and I think I made out with someone
Dude it's 6 am and you just invited me to a hotel with a shit ton of coke. Best morning ever
A massage should never include spaghetti sauce. shit was fucked up
my roommates gone so i can take codeine and sleep naked
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