lol you are funny thanks bro I'll take you to a strip club
I don't wanna go to a strip club I'd rather get my boobs free or earn them from a series of good deeds
Ha! What's wrong with that? Hard work deserves compensation. I accept cash, checks, and boobies!
you told everyone your name was brenda and you had the whole party chanting b-dawgg by the end of the night. successful.
My insides feel lik shag carpet. It is awesome
I think I just made patron unclassy I bought limes at a gas station and for salt we are using gas station packets of salt
I just drank Colt45 out of a champagne glass. I feel classy.
Colt 45 out of anything is classy.
I like how you try to look sexy and just end up looking like a weird boy.
Just so you know I would totally fuck you. Does that count as a feeling?
I had to show the prof your text saying that I could pick up your midterm for you. I covered the part of the screen saying you weren't there because you were about to have morning choke sex.
Wors thing about having a cop dad: random drug testing
You need a sexual gate keeper
Meant to have fun, ended up giving speech about consent to guy at bar. Feminist side feels happy. Orgasms side feels confused and betrayed.
Can I tell you that I just incorporated the spice girls in my sexting and you not judge me
See, remember when you wanted to get an Ashley Madison account and I told you not to and you hated me? You. Are. Welcome.
Don't worry my mom is buying me a vasectomy for Christmas
You stared at a Swedish dude for like 5 minutes then asked him "shouldn't you be yelling at dragons"
Randomize
