If the pens lose tonight I'm gonna drive to Detroit and burn 8 mile to the ground.
Actually I may do that regardless. Probably get my own holiday.
Guy at red light looking at porn. I'm waiting for him to look over at me so I can shake my head and he can feel bad
just put cider in my bong. gotta love fall
the best part is my dad got arrested for the same thing at the same bar 30 years ago... so he cant be mad
I woke up face down on my laptop with three windows open: itunes, chat roulette and redtube
she is using a fork to eat popcorn and refuses to drink gatorade out of anything but a margarita glass... did i mention the popcorn is on a plate?
i remember getting really pissed off when you wouldn't let me sleep in the garage with your cat.
Sometimes I stop and laugh and think "and these are my actual life choices".
I just really need to get the matching flask to go with my pill box. Is this another step towards rock bottom?
My reasons for going are selfish. She just opened her own law firm. I figure having a lawyer as a friend is a good idea. Nothing in my life suggests I won't need a lawyer again.
I don't remember much and some girl almost convinced me to jump off the bridge while she held my stuff...
The dog just shocked himself by peeing on Christmas lights, should I have saw that coming?
I swear every time I see him he's either dancing or trying to touch people
And then I realized my chick friends consist only of sober you, drunk you and hungover you
It was a good thing I was on the balcony flashing those guys or I would have never seen her skipping to his car
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