I'm in a trailer park. But I'm not scared. The virgin always lives.
I drank myself into bisexuality again.
Being the adderall dealer on campus, I feel responsible for everyone graduating.
I just don't know what he sees in my vagina...and that scares me.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I burst into tears on the boat this morning because we bumped a duck in the head. I am way too hung over for today
I was barred out and drunk as fuck locked out at 3am in my Indian costume. It was literally freezing outside. I laid down on the concrete and made a bonfire with dry leaves. Then proceeded to ask.the.bonfire nicely to "please dont go out". Drunk me went strait up survival mode.
this lady just pulled corn on the cob out of her purse
People like that make this world a better place.
I think I reached some stage of aging, have a sore/injured shoulder from sex, next up carpal tunnel from sexting.
HOW AM I SUPPOSED TO GET MY FUCKING CUPCAKES WHEN THE GROUNDSWORKER I HOOKED UP WITH IS LOITERING IN THE VENDING AREA
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I need a conscience and I need it yesterday.
It's a herpes check up not a beauty pageant
We broke up. My life is now 7 inches less.
I remember being like "I can't hold both of you guy's hair back!" so I put headbands on each of you
I get dinner and bf perks from the one guy. But dick with no commitment from the other. I’m living my best life.
The shower rod just came down while I was pooping. I caught it though and the curtain stayed on, so I'm not sure if it's a good or bad omen for the rest of my day
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