Old men and throwing up are my life now.
3 st and 6 ave. One dollar pitchers. Look out world.
How has he not realized you're pregnant?
Locked out of the apartment with just a box of wine way to begin the weekend.
Satisfying Perfect Camera Moments
some guy just walked up to the bench i was on, backflipped off of it, gave me his number and walked away....i love this city
Dude... Hand job in the lake... It was as weird as it sounds.
Clearly he doesn't understand my need to be surrounded by cats at all times
i just saw you make out with a girl with facial hair...just thought i would document that in case you forgot
she screamed "gravy"!!! in the guys face and then stole the very large mans food in line ahead of us... that was just the beginging of the police report.
This Dog Travel Carrier is a Must
Do you ever feel like a plastic bag?!
Was booty called last night and I was so blacked out that my roomie made me puke before going to "eye of the tiger." Why I'm still single is beyond me
Got a 72 hour restraining order. Can we meet monday? Let me know!
He kept telling me Te Amo last night. Over and over. And that he was scared. Drunkenly. In Spanish.
I woke up last night a kitchen floor with my shirt off and I love America written on my leg in eye liner
HOW CAN YOU EXPECT ME TO KEEP YOUR SECRETS IF YOU KEEP ON TELLING ME THEM.