Bts the comment you were making during that picture was "look we have penises"
Hurry. And bring back up. SHE WON'T STOP TALKING.
too bad they don't have a 'people you may be able to do' thing on facebook. it would save me a lot of fucking time.
I'm home with mono, wearing knee high socks, shorts, a stained old shirt, and a surgical mask. He comes over ANYWAY with soup, a gas mask, billions of DVDs, and eats me out. He's either stupid, whipped, or i'm just THAT good.
Theres an amvulance here. It might be for me
I just haven't been myself lately. I slept with a guy 21 years older than me and I've been wearing my hair in a center part.
When I see myself in tank tops and push up bras I seriously wonder why I'm not President.
Today's weekday brunch started at 2pm, and consisted of $7 of sandwich and $50 of cocktails. Also, I hustled the bartender for about $3 playing nickel poker, but he may have been letting me win. Either way, he didn't get into my pants.
I got "plug" during family Catch Phrase and struggled to not make a reference to butt plug so I skipped it
I'm at the point in my life where I'm gonna sell my eggs for cash
WOKE UP NEXT TO A PLATE OF MEATBALLS HAPPY MONDAY
ROB LOWE. SO BEAUTIFUL. SO DOUCHEY. SO HARD TO SPELL HIS NAME WHEN DRUNK.
2:34, make a wish! I wish I wasn't on acid at Planned Parenthood. What's yours?
while on the topic of showers...why is there apple juice in our bathtub?
Most people would agree that it IS in fact slutty to give someone head for free ice cream.
Randomize
