He said he was just looking at my pictures and was thinking about how he wanted to cut my hair..then dye it black and put platnium blonde extensions throughout it and layer my hair
I fell asleep on the toilet again last night...
well that was a long night...
dude, you were pretty messed up... what happened?
no idea... but i still woke up with my pirate hat on
Don't feel obligated to get back to me but I think I just fell in love with a middle aged waitress at the Dennys in waco. She's used but in good condition.
Wait, we're on the hunt for addys and explosives. They're both in this house somewhere.
i need to break up with him. i realized this while i was making a mental grocery list while we were having sex. this is not the first time i've done that.
You should ask if we are margaritasing tomorrow. and yes i did just turn that into a verb
she said she's never had and orgasm AND she's a cubs fan...ouch.
So excited for tonight I might actually pee my pants BEFORE I get blackout
Finally hooked up w/ that yoga instructor chick. Got a little more than I expected. Like a full on bush more than I expected. How do you tell a girl that her bush scares you?
Get the fuck back here. Your brother taped bottle rockets to the front of his scooter and is bombing around screaming, "Rest in peace, Goose!"
So I just crossed my legs and I was like what is this lump on my leg? Oooh its my underwear from last time I wore these jeans...
I just rolled a blunt and took my bra off. I'm not going anywhere.
Updates: Made out with a teletubby last night in the middle of the street #lifegoals
I used my mad pharmacist skills to turn ordinary birth control into morning after. I think my professors would be proud.
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