The best feeling....farting and having the bubble hit your balls
When you're about to leave, tell him "bye." At that point, he should say something. If he doesn't say anything, well, our drinks were free and he gets a free make out with yours truly.
We were making out in the bushes when some dude comes and starts peeing beside us.
I need to not be around brick walls while intoxicated.
He tried to carry her to her room after she passed out, but when he picked her up she came back to, saw him, screamed rape and pulled out her vuvuzela app and blasting it like a rape whistle.
Strip beer pong in the front yard? Of course the cops showed up
please hold off on going into labor, i might need you to take me to the free clinic
I'm really really gonna try not to at least one night. The 4 day thanksgiving bender almost killed me last year
he said good things come in small packages and I decided to hook up with someone else
So I paid for the taxi using pennies and hair clips, no need to thank me.
That's what tomorrow is for. It's like bloodletting. Except with shame and liquor.
In that state of mind I managed to bounce back from getting hit by a golf cart and convince an investigations officer that I was okay to go into the game.
Dude, I have everything I need for meth here.
YOU ARE NOT ALLOWED TO MAKE METH IN OUR APARTMENT.
Say whatever you bloody well like; you don't know the true meaning of life until you have smoked to a Sade cd.
I may have broke the toilet masturbating. On a positive note the floor is really clean now.
Randomize
