You think the Elephant Man ever tried to pick up chicks claiming all his appendages were elephant-sized?
I didn't know that people actually queef. Is this a real thing?
I believe so, yes.
Would you be offended if I asked if it has happened to you?
Did your dad mention the fact that you asked him for viagra at 2 in the morning?
Please tell me you are a size medium in men's clown onesies and that you forgot them here last night.....
Trying to guess which perfume the stripper was wearing based on my bf's clothes
Used a cardboard box as a pillow and a towel as a blanket. Its like the great depression over here
got high to the hills theme song. FEEL THE RAIN ON YOUR SKIN. no regrets.
She called us while she was having sex to ask if we remembered to feed the cat
I dont understand how her boyfriend puts up with her weirdness
I saw the attitude and didn't even try. Line of the night from one guy who talked with them for a while said, "I don't meet you standards. I have a job and would treat you well." She was blank faced.
I'm sending him pics of me in my new lingerie telling him to come over and when he gets here I'll have changed into like sweats and a 5 year old shirt with ketchup stains on it
Just puked in a cup. Poured it out the window.
Well I got black out drunk before the rehearsal dinner and berated my family with insults. But other then that it was a good time
ok first of all what the fuck
I'm literally watching a webcam of the Vegas strip right now and it is making me sad.
My vagina likes him more than I do, but I’m going to follow her lead and see what happens
Randomize
