i'm 85% sure that if you don't visit me i will do something awkward and potentially dangerous to you in your sleep involving chocolate milk and a sham-wow.
So the hot 23 year old i went home with last night is really 17 and was here for orientation.. i feel like a pedifile...
In that case, you should probably come up to the union, orientation is in full swing, your kind of guys ;)
cunt.
i googled "where to have sex in disneyland." i found nothing.
susan atkins died, charles manson's lady
dont cry, there are other serial killers to crush on.
He told me that he wanted to break up with his girl friend but only after we had sex, only for him to make sure I'm worth it..
OMG the post office opened my dildo! "we sincerely regret the damage to your package"
I got a thank you card in the mail from the virgin i slept with on the camping trip. Weird or the new classy?
I just shit a hot coal. Pretty sure it's that fireball shot from yesterday.
I'm happy in my shell. My shell which consists of keeping guys in the friend zone and me masturbating...
You ripped my pants off and gave me the choice use it or lose it what was I suppose to do.
I lost the right to judge tonight
He said his name was Tony, after last night I will refer to him as Tiny
I always can't wait to see you but when there's also an opportunity to get naked it elevates to an entirely different level
She asked what a chaser is. I died a little inside, please come back..
shit... I double booked my fuck buddies
Randomize
