I tried to gradually lead her into my room but she wouldn't stop crying and quoting memoirs of a geisha
Did you know that cab drivers don't take quarters for payment? They don't even like it when you ask.
he broke up with me so i peed in his bed
just threw up in the bushes outside my lecture hall. sometimes i hate the freedom college gives you.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Last night we hooked up in nothing but out UK shirts during half time. Never say I'm not a dedicated fan again.
So I've been to the library twice so far. Both times were for the atm, and once I was stoned. Junior year is going great.
we decided to do a scavenge hunt for ourself for when we walked back to our apartments. We hid taco bell behind some bushes. I think they are still good.
There's a creepy homeless guy with no hand trying to get up on our tacobell order
If this outfit doesn't get me pregnant tonight I don't know what will...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Woke up this morning on my doorstep in a basket with a branch, a lipstick lightning bolt on my head and a sign that said "the boy who lived." i love you guys.
Your cat is quite the conversationalist after some tequila and shrooms
we are blowing up condoms and making balloons and we’re drunk on the floor. You could have come to school here
I specialize in how to hang out and party with randoms after you've hooked up with them. Not in feelings.
And we had three hours of crazy sex then his roommate ate pizza off me while I was sleeping.
Do you want to get naked and order pizza with me
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