glad you had fun, i did too. am rubbing aloe on my butt now.
I am going to be in the room whjen you have your first child and spit on its face before its even all the way out of you.
Yes. It's so easy to pack to leave when you've thrown away half your clothing cause it smells like vomit.
i will pay you if you can come get me. he just suggested that we would have a hockey themed wedding.
I will never swim in a flooded basement again..
Why does She think it's her duty to welcome in freshman through the welcome mat that is her vagina
just found a someones bra in what seems to be a mix of pickle juice and vodka in my fridge. Who was over here lately?
HOW DID YOU GET DEPORTED FROM THE BAHAMAS
And by go well you mean everyone's hammered right?
Yupp. And someone's bleeding
He's holding a pee stick. Yes it's weird.
I'm sorry but the visual image of you suffocating on vagina is basically hysterical
All I have are vague memories of us eating ham?
It was a recodring of you having sex ! It was like an ape and a dying mongoose at a buffet Xoxoxo
He threatened my life and my car because I called you. Are you sure you never slept with him ?
Last night you were throwing up in my toilet singing "all by myself."
Randomize
