if she mentions anything about chili and my phone, just go with it
We videoed ourselves having sex... I now know why I close my eyes during sex
I don't know bro, all I could remember is that he kept saying hallelujah and calling that girl Slutimus Prime
He was all like, "I've prayed every single day just for one more night with you."
Omg just give him a quick handy and walk out.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just entered us to win a trip to Vegas for spring break. GET YOUR VAGINA READY FOR THE ULTIMATE DICK HUNT!
he kept saying that we were in ian's fun time place and then continued to act like a dinosaur.
I made him an O's fan. One pic of my tits coming out of a Baltimore shirt and it was done.
I'm sorry I peed on the bushes at your law firm. Is there anyway you could defend me for the ticket I'm about to get?
If I ever see that bitch it is going down flavor of love style
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You spent the entire night trying to get me to make out with you
yeah I remember. your boyfriend shouldnt have cheered me on though.
i warned you not to do dabs 20 minutes before graduation. You never listen
1. so the new neighbor u called dibs on.. I'm sorry..but not really. 2. She lactates, I guess that happens when you have a kid less then 5 months ago.... WTF!! 3. Is it fucked up I'm craving Ceral & Milk now?
Honey...this isn't my 20's. This is my 30's. I paid for this house and these expensive ass sheets to fuck in them. Get your ass over here.
Granted every 20 shifts of working there you seem to be on par to receive some sort of racy satisfying sexual encounter which money can’t buy
It's sunday night and I just went to the store to buy cookie dough and condoms, I'm so proud of myself.
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