Why don't I have your new number? And who have I been texting?
i wants your nipples near my face. PLEASE????
try this...when you orgasm scream his address including city state and zip...
What are you doing?
High. Watching Billy Mays infomercials...
That guy could sell me cancer.
My dad just told me if I'm going to smoke pot, to make sure I use a clean needle. WTF?
now I regret adding my aunt on facebook. she remnded me today on my wall about the importance of checking my stools for blood since I have diaherria.
If I say "It's good enough" and I'm not talking about a sandwhich, that's your queue to stop me, you're supposed to be my friend.
Sacagawea was the original milf.
Remind me tomorrow to take that ball-gag out of my purse.
I am literally hand feeding my crying ex boyfriend taco bell. What has my life become?
I believe I can fly has to be one of the most inspirational songs of our time. Seriously R. Kelly nailed it
Then he went and peed on those teenagers.
third nipple confirmed
You grabbed my arm, said "I need you" in a very concerned voice and dragged me to the other room where you were blasting Evolution of Beyoncé.
Like the fear of satan was put into my heart when I saw him put that sandwich on the WOODEN BENCH
I wouldn't be able to live with myself if I blew a Trump supporter.
Randomize