I am good. I dancing. Drinking but dancing fine.
the taste of these tagalongs is totally worth boning that creepy troop leader chick...
had to split buying plan b over two cards. I will no longer challenge people to get on my level
oh and then you called a time out with your penis
As we were fooling around he told me he was conceived on this bed like it would turn me on.
Dude she flew me 1000 miles down to see her, broke up with me 7 hrs after arrival, and kicked me out with a week left til I fly home. Thank god college taught me how to shack up
Happiness is watching your asshole boss' police DUI video.
Found my bike today. On top of the garage. I'm not even going to ask myself why.
Mark just took 50mg Viagra. Tonight should be interesting for the neighbors.
well it can jab him in the chin so I am 100% sure he can suck his own dick
I completely forgot about the posting of partying pics shortly after adding my gma my dad was like grandma says your all over fb but she doesn't know how to use it. Of course I'm all over her fb. She's got 6 friends I am her newsfeed
You are hereby uninvited from future Turnt Tuesdays until further notice.
The contents of my fridge consist of alcohol, Nuva ring, and cheesecake. I'm that girl.
How did the test come back?
I've never been so happy to have a yeast infection. And i got a free pack of birth control
He’s exactly what I’m looking for: he’s got a broken heart, a working penis and a new boat!!!
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