I just saw a hot homeless man
Just saw the homeless asian lady making a hispanic man pull her shopping cart with a harness. I love Boston.
He wouldn't know what to do with his penis even if they made a "how to get a blowjob for dummies" guide
He has 250 profile pictures. Of course he was a douchebag
we got plastered, then made lists of anything thats ever been in our vaginas
I know. Brad is upset because he was lower on the list than "that carrot stick"
the wall and i were having dominance issues.
Monday morning margarita madness at ny house. Yes before wheel of fortune. Yes day drinking.
there's chocolate cake in my bathtub.. I don't even want to know how the hell chocolate cake wound up in my tub..
Party Liz is going to have to have her wings clipped until someone gets me some baby reins to wear
The entire state will know me by my boobs.
There really needs to be a redbox for wine because I want some but too lazy to walk into a store
You have mono. It's like being pregnant, your are excused from normal social niceties like responding to people.
I just told the sun to stop. That hungover.
I watched Morgan Freeman explain the existence of nothing, now I'm afraid of sub - atomic particles. these egg rolls are outstanding
Are you seriously getting this frustrated over a hand-job right now?
Randomize
