so I was thinking like, Rob Pattinson could make so much money whoring himself out dressed as Edward Cullen.
yeah, I mean if he's down to fuck a lot of fat chicks and stare at Tiger Beat posters of himself above the bed...
I thought she was mad at me, but then we did a pose off and I realized we're friends for life
Can we comment on the fact that at five thirty this morning, security woke me up in the hotel lobby, in my underwear, and some random guys winter coat?
the kid next to me in training is drinking sangria. its 9am here in case you couldnt calculate. its going to be a good year.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
this will be a night to untag.
She said she was jealous that i could wear headbands, then growled at the ground in shame..
Bon Iver should never be played when you just ate shrooms.
I had a dream where I was about to fight you but you were dressed like a greek god and had just killed a werewolf with your bare hands
He's saved in my phone as 'MURICA. I think it's safe to say I'm not exactly taking him seriously.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
somebody should make me the poster child for not drinking everclear..
So do you know how we found out he was engaged?
An Amber Alert?
he's been dating her for 18 months and cheating on her with me for 16. if that's not commitment, i don't know what is.
I feel like any time there's that much rope, lingerie, and horse masks on the ground, it's safe to say it was a great night
Life update: This fucking MacBook repair guy called me over last night for a booty call and he didn’t have a condom OR a bed
Promise me if ever I think I can't do anything, remind me that I waxed my own butthole
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