You blewit but ill be back in laekciew tonigthso calll mee
I wish i could go to google and type in drug dealers and it would bring up a number, a product and direction
i just lost my virginity over my 3 hour lunch break..
u hav a 3 hour lunch break?!
i like how the length of my lunch break is the thing that phases u
so i woke up.. still drunk and discovered my roommate in the living room passed out dick-in-hand watching porn..
What did u do?
turned the porn up and opened the windows so everybody goin to class could see him..
Nothing like studying in the College of Communication to make you realize how smart you are.
That's because you're a slut. A slut fucking a fence.
oh my god i'm in a crawl space
My arms are sore from holding up pukeahontas for so long
You know it's a good Halloween party when a guy wearing a light-up sombrero offers you blow.
How do you say happy birthday to someone you fuck occasionally that almost got you arrested? Like what do I text.
I'm hungover laying in my moms bed watching Space Jam.. Adult Life..
Is it bad form to spend company money and place an ad in the paper because I wanna nail the sales girl?
I don't know which is worse, the fact that his name is Kevin or the fact that he has a pornstache.
STOP SENDING ME NAKED PICTURES WHEN I'M TRYING TO TEACH. MONDAY TUESDAY 1-3 IS A DICK AND ARSE FREE ZONE
These snow days are takeing a toll on my liver
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