That's what you get for not wearing a bra and jumping on a trampoline
Twist it, pull it, flick it... Bop it was like the first time I touched myself.
Best part is I totaly had to get into my dads car like I didn't have my pants off two minutes ago.
Bro, i just sang journey's "dont stop beleavin" at mcdonalds. and the guy was sooo impressed he gave us free food. God i love america
I would've been fine if I didn't do the three shots
You did like 8
for the record, you never really realize how drunk you still are until you get on rollerskates...
His name is Dustib. Not a typo. I just can't.
I need to quit being a slut. It's to the point that I got my period today and automatically I Believe I Can Fly popped into my head.
The bald guy bought me a shot so I chugged it and then walked out to the middle of the dance floor and told an old woman that might be your moms twin to bend it over...We didn't end on a good note though. Dude she stepped on my vans.
somebody should make me the poster child for not drinking everclear..
Hey! I need booze. And penises. And a lot of mistakes that I will regret in the morning.
I'm using her Instagram as a way to know where in town she is so I can avoid her lol
I'm so cold without your freakishly high body temperature
that's the equivalent to a normal girlfriends. 'I miss you' btw
Is the Glover Park Chipotle past the strip club?
Why is that your only point of reference?
Just answer the question
It should be perfectly legal to tase anyone not wearing a mask.
Randomize
