ur dog is so gonna tell on us one day.
for doing what?
for smoking bowls out on the deck while your parents aren't home.
i fell off the bed in the middle of it, and he yelled "5 second rule" and kept fucking me. i think im in love
I woke up at 1pm, looked in the mirror and fist pumped...I might still be drunk
you two started sword fighting with 3 ft tall spruce trees you pulled out of planters
And then somehow we were arguing over how to fold our arms
Make sure to show her the sewer we were arrested in on your tour.
My feelings are currently in a sea of vodka and "I don't give a shit"
Aren't they always?
I just shit my pants and had a heart attack. Simultaneously. May or may not be related to this game.
You didn't try to help me when I fell on the dance floor. She brought me cupcakes. You're a shitty friend, suck your own dick.
Panda onesie. Pizza. Netflix. Wrapped up like a burrito. Screw you guys and your cute relationships THIS IS WHAT INFINITE HAPPINESS TASTES LIKE
Pornhub is still operational. Therefore, the world has NOT come to an end in the blizzard!
I was laying out of the open window, talking with him on the phone, while we were both puking at the same time.. Guys at the party called it "true love"..
Fuck that guy and his dumb haircut and awesome dick
According to timehop today marks the 3rd anniversary of my 1st blackout
Tell her that we understand the angle wasn't the best on the first video and that we forgive her.
Randomize
